Après Toi
by Virgo Shaka
Summary: YAOI! Songfic, one-shot. Milo finds out that Camus is cheating on him.


This is YAOI/SLASH, which means m/m love, so don't read it if you don't like it. It's my first story, so constructive criticism will be appreciated.  
  
Title : Après Toi  
  
Author : Virgo Shaka  
  
Pairings: Saga x Camus, Milo x Camus  
  
Rating: don't know, PG13 I guess  
  
Warning : songfic, yaoi, POV  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything, the characters are property of Masami Kurumada, and the song belongs to M. Panas, Klaus Munro and Yves Dessca  
  
Tu t'en vas  
  
L'amour a pour toi  
  
Le sourire d'une autre  
  
Je voudrais mais ne peux t'en vouloir  
  
Désormais  
  
Tu vas m'oublier  
  
Ce n'est pas de ta faute  
  
Et pourtant tu dois savoir  
  
I couldn't believe what DeathMask had just told me. Camus was cheating on me with Saga !? It sounded so ridiculous that I had to go and check for myself. I didn't know where to find them, but DeathMask told me that they'd often meet in the bathhouse after sunset, or whenever I was not around. I started to get suspicious, because no one, not even DeathMask, would play such a cruel trick on anyone. "Do you want a witness?" he asked innocently. I swear I would have killed him if I hadn't been so distressed about Camus' possible betrayal. He accompanied me nevertheless. I sill can't believe what I saw when I opened the door to the bath. Camus sat on the edge with his eyes closed, obviously enjoying what Saga, who was sitting between his thighs, did to him. What happened after that is a mystery. The last thing I remember is that DeathMask carried me back to his Temple where I must have fallen asleep. The next morning Camus came to find me. He told me he'd felt my cosmos the night before, when he was with Saga and that we needed to talk as soon as possible. I realised it too and we went back to my Temple, for it was really none of DeathMask's business. On our way up I thought he would apologize for his behaviour, but my last hope went flying when he told me that he really loved Saga. "Why? How long has this been going on?" I asked, almost in tears. He just sighed, but didn't answer my question. He then started to pack the few things he'd always kept in my Temple, a few books, some clothes. "I'm leaving, Milo.", was everything he said before he left. "Camus, I love you!" I yelled when he slammed the door in my face. I wished that I could have gotten angry at him, but I couldn't, I could just break down and cry like a little girl. I laid there for about two days before I found the courage to get up again. I tried to hate and despise him, that would have been much easier, but I couldn't. I kept loving him, even if I knew that he didn't feel the same way anymore.  
  
Qu'après toi  
  
Je ne pourrai plus vivre, non plus vivre  
  
Qu'en souvenir de toi  
  
Après toi  
  
J'aurai les yeux humides  
  
Les mains vides, le c?ur sans joie  
  
Avec toi  
  
J'avais appris à rire  
  
Et mes rires ne viennent que par toi  
  
Après toi je ne serai que l'ombre  
  
De ton ombre  
  
Après toi  
  
After his departure I was a zombie for quite a while. Not even Aiolia's jokes and Mû's genuine concern could cheer me up. It was as if my life was over, but that some god had forgotten to finish me off. Why was I here? Everything I had ever cared for had left with Camus. The one I really wanted to fight was Saga, for stealing my lover, but I knew I didn't stand a chance, he would kill me from the first attack, or send me to another dimension. I was not afraid of death, but I didn't want to be sent into another dimension for eternity, so I decided to abandon that thought. For days and days I couldn't think about anything but the past. I remembered every little thing, every sweet word and every kiss he had ever given me. It drove me nuts.  
  
I was quite happy to have found sort of a friend in Aphrodite who came to visit me a few times a week, and he let me talk about Camus just as much as I needed it. He didn't try to cheer me up or he wasn't overly concerned about my well-being, he just listened to my stories and he held me when I cried, which was just what I needed at the time.  
  
Même une jour si je fais ma vie  
  
Si je tiens la promesse  
  
Qui unit peut-être pour toujours  
  
Après toi  
  
Je pourrai peut-être  
  
Donner de ma tendresse  
  
Mais plus rien de mon amour  
  
Slowly, my life got back on track. I started to go out again, and visit some of my fellow Saints sometimes, but there was an emptiness in my heart that could never be filled again. I always missed Camus, and I never stopped for a moment thinking about him and about the time we shared together.  
  
He was the love of my life, and that will never change. Of course, I've slept with other men and women since the day he left me, hell, I think I slept with everyone here in Sanctuary, except for Saga of course. I still can't stand his presence, the fact that he's alive bothers me and when I think about him and Camus being all lovey-dovey. It makes me sick!  
  
I hope that they're happy, after all, Camus has been my best friend and lover for years. But for myself I can say that I'll never ever fall in love again. Love. I won't fall for it a second time. I'm going to sleep around a bit, and I'll try to be happy on my own. It can't be that hard, can it?  
  
Après toi  
  
Je ne pourrai plus vivre, non plus vivre  
  
Qu'en souvenir de toi  
  
Après toi  
  
J'aurai les yeux humides  
  
Les mains vides, le c?ur sans joie  
  
Avec toi  
  
J'avais appris à rire  
  
Et mes rires ne viennent que par toi  
  
Après toi je ne serai que l'ombre  
  
De ton ombre  
  
Après toi.  
  
End 


End file.
